How far would I go to have a child? The desire to have a child entails the willingness to go through the misery of morning sickness, first trimester fatigue, the excruciating pain of actually giving birth, the risks to my health. I would be open to having a c-section if necessary for the health and safety of my child.
I've restricted my diet, given up alcohol and caffeine. I spend time every morning organizing supplements. I choke down concoctions of wheat grass and Chinese herbs.
I've endured a saline hysterosonogram. I am having a hysteroscopy in two weeks. If I could have a laproscopy, I would have one.
These are minimal interventions. If pregnancy doesn't result, the recommendation is for a round of injectables, followed by IVF. The side effects of the "minimally invasive" fertility drugs that my RE has recommended include headaches, mood swings, abdominal tenderness, ovarian cysts. Many women report that the IVF drugs permanently change their bodies. They also carry the risks of hot flashes, cysts, and Ovarian Hyper-Stimulation Syndrome.
The risks of many interventions are also financial. Many women with diminished ovarian reserve cannot get pregnant with their own eggs. They must use the eggs of a donor, often with a price tag of $35,000. A cheaper alternative is to ask a friend of family member to donate for you. Would I be willing to watch my sister inject stimulants in the hopes that she has eggs to give me?
Some women with adenomyosis cannot carry a pregnancy to term. To bear their own, biological child, they must use a surrogate, another womb on loan. A popular option is to go to India, where a woman will bear your child for far less than the going rate in the US.
Is it all worth it, once we have that child in our arms? Is any intervention, procedure, or transaction okay, as long as we can parent? When do we decide to call it quits?
How far would you go to have a child?
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